Horror

Review of Videodrome

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Videodrome DVD CoverRating: ★★★★★★☆☆☆☆

Review

A television programmer attempts to signal into a mysterious broadcast of people being tortured and possibly murdered for entertainment. Considering this could be the future of television, Max Renn pursues the source of the broadcast slowly being brought through a series of techno-hallucinations. The film quickly escalates further and further from its original tone, eventually devolving into such a  uniquely fascinating take of insanity and 80’s aesthetic horror. Director David Cronenberg has created a fair amount of bizarre films in his long run as a director, but Videodrome is Cronenberg at his most merciless. You get the impression he has something to say, but it’s drowning in one disgustingly bizarre scenario after another.

Reason to Watch

Well, James Woods pulls a gun out of his own chest and goes on a murder spree. Oh, and he makes out with a tv. I think there’s a message there, but when the tv began going on a rampage, I sort of forgot thinking about it.

Context

Perfectly embodies a bizarre 80’s vibe through one of Canada’s most notoriously wicked directors, David Cronenberg.

Most Memorable Quote(s)
  • Max Renn: I want you to stay away from them. Those mondo-weirdo video guys. You know, in some countries, like Argentina, making subversive video is considered a criminal act. They execute people for it. In Pittsburgh… WHO KNOWS?
  • Nicki Brand: I live in a highly excited state of overstimulation
What You Need to Get Through This Movie

It’s not necessarily SUPPOSED to make sense, and don’t assume everything you see is a halluncination, because that gives the film one of those “it was all just a dream” vibes, and that’s awful and lame.

Trivia

Videodrome is one of the most sampled sources in history, apparently especially among heavy metal musicians. I guess metalheads like cheesy 80’s special effects and flesh eating organisms. Makes sense to me.

Educational Content

If you are in need of a weapon to be attached to your arm to kill a distasteful tv personality, tear your own chest open.

Justification for Rating

Though Videodrome is undoubtedly silly and entirely over-the-top, there is some intriguing substance here for those who want to dive beneath the surface of the overtly bizarre.

Clip

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdOnUtHamko

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Horror

Review of Night of the Living Dead

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Night of the Living DeadRating: ★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

Review

Night of the Living Dead originated the zombie craze, and George Romero is more than responsible. It’s not cheery, it’s not happy, and the ending is painfully immediate. Though there were attempts to remake and re colorize and revisit this film over the ages (basically they molested it), the original disturbing charm of the original is where it is at. The film follows a closely-knit small group of stragglers who fight amongst themselves in a zombie apocalypse. They are isolated, alone, and still manage to bicker about nonsense. As you can see, the film created zombie staples that remain to this day.

Reason to Watch

Well, this first zombie film in the …Of the Dead has dated the absolute worst of them all, so for that, it’s required viewing.

Context

For it’s time, the film was intensely horrifying. Even a few murders scenes were still quite shocking for modern viewing, especially putting it in the context of the era. But really, it’s a black and white horror/zombie flick from George Romero, and the pure insanity and low-budgetry of it is impressive. It holds up terribly over time, but that’s key to a great cult film.

Most Memorable Quote(s)
  • Tom: Well… the television said that’s the right thing to do. 
  • Sheriff McClelland: Good shot! OK, he’s dead; let’s go get ‘im. That’s another one for the fire. 
  • Field Reporter: Are they slow-moving, chief? 
    Sheriff McClelland: Yeah, they’re dead. They’re all messed up. 
What You Need to Get Through This Movie

Your very own zombie coloring book, so you can try to add some color to this lifeless movie.

Trivia
  • Night of the Living Dead is free domain, meaning it is essentially for public use. The original studio neglected to place a copyright, apparently thinking it wasn’t worth the $15
  • the film is available free for viewing just about everywhere
  • The majority of the film was just sort of improvised, coming up with genius lines like “There is no Sunday school picnic!”
Educational Content

You thought zombies were slow? There even slower. Wait. Slloooower. Their basically crawling, their babies. Never go to the cellar in a zombie apocalypse, and killing children is okay if they are out to eat your limbs.

Justification for Rating

The film deserves to stand right in the middle, as it is iconic in creating many zombie film staples, but it has also aged teribly. Though some people like that style, and that is okay to. basically, Night of the Living Dead was supposed to be serious and anything but satire, and the effects and film making made it just the opposite. And now over 40 years later, it’s got this weird mix of serious/stupid, and we still don’t really know what it’s supposed to be.

Clip

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gUKvmOEGCU

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Horror

Review of Scared to Death

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Scared to DeathRating: ★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

Review

This film starts out in a morgue with two doctors feeling bad because of the task assign to them . The two doctors must find out what happened to the young wopman on the table who as died. Soon the scene is one where the young woman Laura is telling the story of her life and death. We soon find out that Laura was married to the son of a doctor and this is no happy marriage. Ward her husband wants out and his father is willing to help. Laura tells us that she was held against her will while the doctor and his son attempted to drive her mad or scared her to death. Entered into the story is an ex detective whose awaiting a murder to redeem himself, a noisy housemaid , a reporter with his brainless girlfriend and the creepy hyptonist with his dwarf friend who know a secret. As the movie moves along we learn that Laura may have been married before and betrayed her first husband to the Nazi’s. Is it her new husband and his father trying to scare her to death or the spirit of her first husband come back from the dead?

Reason to Watch

Even though the script is horrific. One shouldn’t miss Scared to Death for the movie is fun. I mean where else can you find so many sany characters under one roof. No one is trying for an Oscar in this movie so all you get is a bunch of actors just attempting to remember there lines. The great part is that you get to watch as they try to finish this movie. I couldn’t even figure out what the dwarf’s name was the detective keeps calling him Indigo while Lugosi calls hom Ingo. There is also a great scene where Indigo or Inigo stomps the detective foot which is straight out of the three stooges.

Context

The movie was released in 1947 post WWll hence the reference to the Nazi’s. The women in the movie are typicall women of movies from this era helpless with know direction.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

1. “Pardon me, Professor, but didn’t I just see you outside baying at the moon.
2.The scene where the maid attempts to announce the arrival of Leonide. He tells her. My dear girl, if I allowed myself to be announced, I doubt I would be recieved anywhere.

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

You will need a foley implanted in your bladder if you plan to watch this movie on some late night movie channel and not on dvd. You need the foley for if you get up to go to the restroom you’ll miss some thing and be totally confused. Beyond confused you’ll miss good laugh scenes. Oh, don’t forget your 3D glasses. No, the films not in 3D but you might want them for the blue or green mask collage that keeps appearing. And don’t forget earplugs to drown out the spooky music that comes for no reason.

Trivia

One of only three films in color Bela Lugosi ever appeared in. In fact, Scared to Death, which was filmed in Cinecolor is the only color film in which Bela Lugosi was the star.

Educational Content

1. Never knew a doctor could listen to your heart and discover you were hypnotised.
2. This film will encourage you to stop drinking or find a new group of friends after you witness poor Wards fate of an unplanned marriage after to much partying.
3. Never let a creepy guy and a dwarf who are dressed alike enter your home you just know troubles coming.
4. Only time I’ve ever witnessed someone look at a BW photo and still figure out colors in the photo.

Justification for Rating

I give Scared to Death a five for it’s a movie that attemps to hold on to what it set out to be. A great cheesy B- movie and that folks is just what it is. There no over acting for the actors in this movie for theres no real script in the first place. But like I said everyone tries and thats what makes a great movie.

Clip

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Fantasy

Review of The Phantom Planet

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The Phantom PlanetRating: ★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Review

Imagine little people fighting big hungry invaders.Now imagine hero astronaut who comes to save the day. Thats Phantom Planet; well almost. When an astronaut is forced to make a crash landing on a remote astroid he gets more than he bargain for. In order to survive the astonaut must wonder out his spaceship and breath the air on this astroid. Breathing the air has drastic consequences for the astronaut as he discovers he’s shrinking. Shruken to a measley 6 inches he soons finds out that he’s not alone; as there are other wee little people on the astroid with him. These wee little people inform him of there fate; the battle against the scary Solarites. The Solarites are creatures who wish to eat the wee little people. Our hero and the wee little people who have turned the astroid into a spaceship forge a battle against the evil Solarites. And of course, fall in love along the way.

Reason to Watch

There is nothing ike a cheap science fiction movie where all care and concern for accuracy is thrown out the window.The Phantom Planet is one movie where all concern for truth and reality was left on the doorstep. However, the movie is a great sci fi movie. It has action and even a love story. The pig faced Solarites are funny looking and I don’t know about you but every time I saw the wee little people I couldn’t help but think about the dwarves in The Wizard of Oz. Sure you can’t help but laugh at some of the corny lines that were written but hey thats what makes the movie so much fun. The sound efects even remind you a western shootout while the fight scenes are almost comical. The women are straight out of the sixties movie era; over flowing with lust fill eyes at the male lead. The goofs are obvious; for instance, the lead star in one scene looks at his wrist for the time even though he has no watch.

Context

The movie was made in the early sixities when America and the world was entering the space race. Everyone had dreams of what outer space held and Hollywood was ready to fuel there interest. Did it matter if Hollywood got it right? No, the only thing that the average movie goer was concerned about was good entertainment and Hollywood was prepaired to feed the hungry masses.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

Here are some best lines from the movie that am sure you’ll find funny and deeply moving. “You know Captain, every year of my life I grow more and more convinced that the wiset and the best is to fix our attention on the good and the beautiful. If you just take the time to lok at it.” Is this not dramatic writing. The Oscars were awaiting

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

First, don’t attempt to watch this movie alone I suggsest four to six close friends who share your worst tendencies. Why the need for a group? Well your going to need someone to help you finish all that beer am going to tell you to buy. Phantom Planet can be tedious at times like pulling teeth; yet, so corny that you can’t stop watching. Have you ever pass a car weak and just couldn’t pull your attention away? Phantom Planet will grab your attention in the same way. You won’t to turn away but can’t. And don’t forget that with a large group of friends you’ll always have someone to turn off the television if you drift of into space.

Trivia

Included in the cast of Phantom Planet are some legendary actors. Richard Kiel, known for his charater (Jaws) in the seventies James Bond action movies plays an evil giant Slorarite out to devour the citizens of Phantom Planet.

Educational Content

1. I never knew that breathing air could change your whole molecular make up and turn you into a wee little person.
2. Never knew that one could walk in outer space unteathered.
3. Check out the spaceship that takes off straight up into space but lands on it’s side.
4. Or a people so advance with space technology yet still live in caves and have no social graces.

Justification for Rating

Even though this movie is comical the film is still a crowd pleaser as it tries to entertain us with science fiction fantasy and action . Within the movie you can see the rise of the future science fiction shows like Star Trek.

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Horror

Review of Last Woman on Earth

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Last Woman on EarthRating: ★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Review

Due to the radioactive fallout from a returning space probe, dead bodies are returning to “life” and stalking human prey, eating their victims once they catch up to them. A group of disparate people barricade themselves inside a farmhouse hoping to be rescued from these beings. I’m sure that at the time of its release, this classic, influential movie shocked and repulsed viewers. Time, and countless pale imitations, have taken some of its impact away, but it’s still great viewing. The budget – which I can believe was very low – only serves to gives the movie an almost realistic feel. Acting is very sharp, especially from top-billed Duane Jones, cast in what must have been the first (or one of the first) instances of a horror movie having an African-American hero. The only sour note may be that the leading female character, played by Judith O’Dea, is unfortunately one-note – wimpy and useless. This movie is actually more genuinely spooky than many of the more glossier and explicit horror movies released since. In fact, in a similar fashion to Tobe Hooper’s “The Texas Chain Saw Massacre”, the movie makes quite a good use out of a low budget, and it’s entertaining throughout. Co-writer / director George A. Romero and co-writer John Russo have bit parts; co-stars Karl Hardman (who plays ‘Harry Cooper’) and Russell Streiner (who appears uncredited as ‘Johnny’) were the movie’s producers. Remade by Romero in 1990; followed by “Dawn of the Dead” in 1978 and “Day of the Dead” in 1985 and then a slew of “Return of the Living Dead” feature

Most Memorable Quote(s)

I liked every line by this writer.

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

My friends forced me to watch this.

Educational Content

I love the way it is directed.

Justification for Rating

I liked this movie very much

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