Horror

Review of The Screaming Skull

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The Screaming SkullRating: ★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Review

When a stale looking newlywed couple show up at the home of the husband’s late wife. Some odd placed mysterious events cause his new bride to believe she is going absolutely insane.

Reason to Watch

It’s just so bad its good. The twisted up face of actress Peggy Webber make you want to laugh but also hide behind your pillow. The dreamy creepy scene where moments before Jenni (Peggy) show some skin, is my favorite part because she just pops up and scares the heck out of me.

Context

This is a gem of B rated horror flicks, falling into the times of other great films like “20000 Leagues” and “OK Coral”. Its a must see that should be added on the belt notch of cult movie fans.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

Jenni Whitlock: Eric, when you found me, what else was there?

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

Any opiate close at hand paired with a bottle of NoDoz trucker pills, along with love for black and white films will help you through the first 15 minutes. After that you’ll need a good pal to sit there with you, each taking turns slapping the other awake so that you don’t miss the mysteriousness of bad music and a whole bunch of nothing.

Trivia

How many skulls does it take to drive a newlywed batty?

Educational Content

If a priest gives you intimate details pertinent to your survival, don’t believe he’ll keep that abortion a secret.

Justification for Rating

There’s just enough screaming to possibly drive anyone watching it nuts, if a film can do that it deserves 3 stars in our book.

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Action

Review of The Phantom Ship

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Phantom ShipRating: ★★★½☆☆☆☆☆☆

Review

This movie is the action/thriller/mystery/horror film about the legendary Marie Celeste. A phantom ship that was found floating adrift in the ocean in 1872. The ship was still fully stocked with the goods it was preparing to deliver. The sails were fully set and no one was found on board.
The movie is a fictionalized account of what they believe might have happened. In the story, the crew are disgruntled from day one when they were forced to join the crew. The animosity is present at the start and each member of the crew has their own reason for wanting the captain dead. To make matters worse, he has brought his new bride which only adds to the tension.
It doesn’t help that the person in charge of the crew hands is sadistic and continually beats the crew. He is brutal and mean, and it sets the sailors all on edge.

Reason to Watch

This movie is a classic B picture. If you are looking for great acting…this ain’t it! The movie is worth watching for 2 reasons.
1. The overacting, especially Bela Lugosi, is worth watching. It’s truly comical to watch how some of the actors in this movie contort their fact to show the horror of what is happening.
2. The big murder scene, we see one of the characters getting shot in the butt. You would think this would just knock him to the ground, instead we see him do a classic over the top death, with a quick shot to the butt.

Context

This movie was made when Bela was a big star. I’m sure this was a vehicle that they had hoped would draw off his star power. Done in the 50s, and in black and white, there was no need for big special effects.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

“Black cat…that’s bad.”

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

I would recommend watching this movie with a high potent energy drink. While spots have some comedic value, there are times this story draaaags!

Trivia

I couldn’t find any trivia for this movie…sorry.

Educational Content

It’s amazing in the movie that even though they just threw the corpse in, there was a shark immediately there to be attracted to it. I have always understood that sharks are actually attracked to the movement and thrashing…and that if you are near a shark, you shouldn’t move so it would swim by.

Justification for Rating

While you may find yourself wondering if you should set the snooze alarm to keep yourself awake, there are moments this movie isn’t that bad. The story is pretty well written, but the acting prevents you from fully enjoying it.

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Scifi

Review of Zontar the Thing From Venus

Scifi 1 Comment »

Zontar the Thing From VenusRating: ★★★★★★☆☆☆☆

Review

This is not yout typical cheesy B flick. It was cornier the most yet I have to admit i kind of liked it. i’m not really into this type of Sci Fi but I am glad I saw this movie. There is a rocket scientist, who makes a home made “high power” radio set. With this radio he starts to get messages from Zontar. Zontar is from Venus and thinks Earth people need to see/learn what it’s like to be without our form of communication. He wants to be in command of everyone. People can’t even take a bath without the okay from this Venus weirdo! The rest of the movie I was kind of lost. It was hard to follow as nothing really made any sense- typical of these type of films.I mean the film had these bat looking animals biting people and putting a micro chip in them that made them virtual slaves to this Zontar creature. I guess it could have been worse 🙂 The drama in the movie was great. the actors did a great job!

Reason to Watch

If you are into old SciFi movies and have a funny compulsion for outerspave weirdos that land on Earth to try and take over our world you will not be disappointed!

Context

This movie was released in 1966 in Dallas Texas. The idea at that time was aliens were being spotted in our desert states (Texas, Arizonia, etc) so filming in texas at that time was made for a more believable movie.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

It must come from learning; it must come from the very heart of Man himself.

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

You need these things:
1) A beer bong and a 12 pack
2) A water bong and a lot of medicinal marijuanna
3) A lifelong membership to StarTrek fanclub
4) an IQ of 12
or
5)A total love of all things cheesy and super corny!

Trivia

This movie wasshot in 16mm and color. It was also made for television, not released in theaters.

Educational Content

If you ever come across a creature from Venus and you are a lady you do have a chance of survivng, heck you might even get your very own gun! All you have to do is stick your chest out, add a little padding if needed and smile!
In extreme situations you may have to disrobe.

Justification for Rating

I gave this movie a 6. It is not the best SciFi but it looked as though the cast really put their heart into the project because it was good acting for such a chessy film. I thought it was well written. Vontar was a mess but…

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Horror

Review of White Zombie

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White Zombie Rating: ★★★½☆☆☆☆☆☆

Review

Madeleine and Neil are a young couple in love (roses are red, violets are blue and so on…). As it happens in movies, someone yet is in love with Madeleine. That someone is Beaumont, who invites them on his Haitian plantation to be married there. Madeleine and Neil agree without knowing of his intentions. Beaumont decided to get married with Medelein in any way. He asked for help the local voodoo sorcerer who is called Legendre who will try to help him in his intentions…….Enough from me, U have to watch the rest……

Reason to Watch

Actors = good, story…OK – good idea, movie – slow, and zombies do look pretty pitiful. But, helloooo, those are 30’s! What do you expect?! So if you are a horror movie fan go on and watch the movie because it DOES have its moments, even if they’re few.

Context

It is the first film dealing with zombies, a popular horror film subject of the last forty years, first released on August 4, 1932. This is classic Lugosi movie and helped set the tone for the future of horror.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

Beaumont: “I thought that beauty would be enough for me—but the soul is gone!” Legosi: “Fuck you, bitch! Hows ’bouts you be my zombie, too!”

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

There is only one black actor in the movie and rest of the “black population” in the movie are white people with their faces colored to black.

Trivia

There is only one black actor in the movie and rest of the “black population” in the movie are white people with their faces colored to black.

Educational Content

If some girl don’t want you, just turn her into a zombie.

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Horror

Review of Werewolf Woman

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Werewolf Woman Rating: ★★★★½☆☆☆☆☆

Review

Believe it or not kids, there was once a day when porn was not a mouse click away. Back in those days we had find other ways to see boobs and horror films provided that opportunity — I remember the joys seeing The Hunger for the first time, that section of video took some ware and tear I can tell you. So why this relevant? Well “Werewolf Woman” is basically a softcore porn film mascarading as a horror. So the film starts of with naked woman dancing around surrounded by fire before she turns into a werewolf and kills some people. Flash forward to the modern day where distant relative Daniella Neseri (Annik Borel) having been raped now makes an emotional connection to her families past and goes and kills some men by biting out their throats. Now she does not turn into a were-wolf she just acts like one. She is however cured when she falls in love with a stuntman, they run a long by sea and she laughs as he jumps through windows, but she is later raped by 3 men and her boyfriend is killed, this sets her off again and she ends up in an asylum. This is campy 70s horror, red red blood and loads of pointless nudity, best of all it is based on a true story, but any similarities between anyone real purely coincidental.

Reason to Watch

Well porn is pretty easy to get hold of these days, so the number one reason to see this film is out. So my vote goes for the story that sees woman running around naked biting out people’s throats. Just super.

Context

This is a typical exploitation horror film of 70s and staple for Director Rino Di Silvestro whose other films included “The Erotic Dreams of Cleopatra”, “Sex Slayer” and “Love and Death in a Women’s Prison”. The nudity goes beyond what would be seen in English language horror films and was even dubbed a video nastie and banned in the UK.

Most Memorable Quote(s)

“I saw you making love with Fabin, it was obscene, disgusting, but you liked it.” “Daniella, did you see that fall, wasn’t it gay!”

What You Need to Get Through This Movie

I suggest watching this movie like a teenager from the 80s. That means a box of tissues and the video remote control so you can fast forward the boring medical shit and get straight to the porn.

Trivia

Annik Borel (also seen in “Blood Orgy of the She Devils”) made 2 more movies before she quit acting never to be seen again. The film was marketed under several titles including “Daughter of a Werewolf”, “Naked Werewolf Woman”, “Terror of the She Wolf” and bizzarly in America “The Wolf Man”. Selected by Quentin Tarantino for the First Quentin Tarantino Film Fest in Austin, Texas, 1996. Tarantino had actually never seen the picture before he screened it. He loved it so much that all subsequent Film Fests had a surprise movie added to the end of each all-nighter known as the “Wolf Woman” selection; defined as an outrageous exploitation film sure to wake the audience up. “Wolf Women” selections over the years have included The Blood Spattered Bride and Mighty Peking Man.

Educational Content

1. Trained stuntmen can fall off buildings, fly through windows, but can’t take a chair to the back.
2. You are going to be at least as crazy your ancestors.
3. Avoid nude women in the woods.
4. Don’t make a She-wolf give you a blow job.
5. She-wolfs have really hairy boobs.
6. Stunt men can’t resist jumping through windows to impress the ladies.

Justification for Rating

Well this film was a lot of fun, although I could have done with less nudity and more wolf, but I guess the costume and make-up department blew their load on the opening sequence. It is great tale of revenge, the wicked are punished and the only victim is everyone else.

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