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10 Bad Movies You Didn’t Know You Loved

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Pink Flamingos

Before he was tame enough to appear on The Simpsons and commercial enough to make movies with A-List hollywood celebrities, John Waters shocked the world (or Baltimore, at least) when he released this bit of trash-o-rama history. Starring the late Divine, this contest of filth features talking assholes, chicken-fucking, and shit-eating. Real shit-eating. Be sure to see this on an empty stomach!

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Plan Nine From Outer Space

You can’t be a cult film fanatic if you haven’t sat down to watch Edward D. Wood Jr.’s classic Plan Nine from Outer Space. More recognizable after Tim Burton’s Ed Wood deified him, at one time this movie was considered the worst to ever have been made. Though we absolutely disagree, this movie definitely takes some cult discipline to make it through to the absolute end. Look for some of the most awesome UFOs ever committed to celluloid during the first five minutes.

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Leonard Part 6

Bill Cosby plays James Bond-esque super-spy Leonard Parker who must come out of retirement to save the world once again, but this time he must face his most challenging foes. Medusa Johnson (Gloria Foster, the dead oracle from the Matrix) heads a terrorist animal rights group, hellbent on world domination. With the help of his “armpit missiles,” Cosby just might stand a chance of defeating the oddest mix of villains you will ever see, including a man-eating rabbit and a plethora of pissed-off bullfrogs.

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Evil Dead II “Dead By Dawn”

The Cristal of classic cult films, Bruce Campbell battles it out with demons from the Necronomicon. Gore, naked witches, talking trees, a killer hand, and a chainsaw-appendage all appear in this film.  Being stranded in the mountains could not be more fun, unless your name is Ned Beatty.

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Cool as Ice

This could be the worst movie you never knew you loved. Early 90s ghetto fabulous rapper and urban heartthrob Robert Van Winkle (better know by his Jive name “Vanilla Ice”) takes on asthmatic mobsters and small town stereotypes to save his would-be underage girlfriend and her family. Nothing is off limits to Vanilla Ice, be it bright pants,  questionable man-boy touching, or equestrian jumping.

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14 Responses to “10 Bad Movies You Didn’t Know You Loved”

  1. Margapantalones Says:

    I don’t think I know of anybody who actually LOVES Pink Flamingos. However, without going to my address book, I can think of several who are genuinely terrified of it.

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  2. Greg Says:

    Well, when I saw it, I don’t think I could look at a large women in the streets without seeing burning trailers for about two years. I’m still getting over it and Casey has to bring it up! And I think he honestly loves that movie – he has a poster of it (signed by Waters) on his wall… so creepy.

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  3. Margapantalones Says:

    Is it a poster of Divine? Or the singing butthole? What in that movie could be pleasant enough (aside from the signature, of course) to be displayed on the wall?

    How do you suppose Waters found someone with a singing butt? Can you imagine what that Craigslist ad must have been like?

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  4. Steve Says:

    HAHAHAH, gotta love craigslist, I got a used set of tires and the clap from the same person.

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  5. Casey Says:

    It’s autographed by Waters himself, but what I wouldn’t do for an autograph of the gentleman with the butthole!

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  6. Margapantalones Says:

    INDEED, because that’s where the real talent is.

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  7. Greg Says:

    You people have a funny idea of talent.

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  8. Margapantalones Says:

    You’re just jealous because you have a tail instead of a singing asshole.

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  9. Steve Says:

    Well it’s good that we can count on Maggie for input without her this post would be stale

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  10. Greg Says:

    bread with moldy crust and served with murky water.

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  11. Steve Says:

    nom nom nom! Sounds very British

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  12. web Says:

    Ugh, Pink Flamingos!

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  13. Greg Says:

    Are we back to the Pink Flamingos thing again? Didn’t we just have this conversation?

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  14. Greg Says:

    Ok, after watching The Last Dragon, I think Cultflicks needs a top ten best bad movies you’ve never even heard of.

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